I want to confess something: I tried to become a children’s illustrator 12 years ago!
Here’s some art from my old portfolio. I believe I used Adobe Illustrator and Corel Painter for these.
There are a few reasons that I took a step back from children’s illustration back then:
- I quit my day job too early! I had heard a few inspiring stories of artists bravely quitting their day jobs and focusing on creating art full-time, and thought, “I want that too!” What those stories don’t really tell you is that the art jobs don’t suddenly come pouring in just because you’ve cleared your schedule. It seems obvious in hindsight, but I was due for a reality check!
- I was insecure about my portfolio. While I had the confidence to go pro, I was still hesitant to draw a variety of subject matter and stand by the work I’d made. When I received feedback from art directors and agents about what to improve, I’d take the feedback extremely personally and felt like I had to start over from scratch. (It wasn’t even bad feedback, I was told my portfolio showed a lot of potential. It just goes to show that we can be our own worst critics!) I’d start projects to go in a new direction, only to quit due to self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy.
- It was a bad time to take big risks, financially, physically, and emotionally. My kids were still little, and I was a mom first and foremost, 24-7! We lived in an expensive city and bills needed to be paid. I had saved up a lot in order to quit my day job, but my savings were diminishing quickly. On top of that, I was developing health issues that required a lot of doctor-ordered rest. It certainly wasn’t the best timing to launch a new career!
I was able to do a few illustration jobs – activity pages for a kids’ magazine, children’s theatre posters, a self-published children’s book, a card game, etc. – but as the challenges snowballed and my confidence took a beating, I decided to take down my website and focus on my health and my family for the next few months… Months which turned to years, and I even stopped drawing altogether for a little while. I went back to freelance translating to pay the bills. I was disappointed about not becoming an illustrator, but overall, I don’t regret that period of rest, since I was able to raise my kids and take care of my health.
My kids have now become amazing, mostly self-sufficient teenagers, and my eldest daughter is graduating high school this year. I have a day job in translation that I absolutely love…but I’m drawing every spare moment I have! I’ve gained confidence in my art style as well, so I’m now excited to receive feedback that will challenge me and help my art skills grow. (I received a rejection e-mail the other day that made me so happy that my artwork had been seen by an art director!) I now know that rejections are not actually saying “you suck as a person”, they just mean “not right now, but maybe someday soon”! 😄
I hope my somewhat cautionary tale inspires you to never give up on your own dreams! There might be some detours and setbacks along the way, but you’ll learn how to be resilient and believe in yourself. 🧡